Air Force Miracles

A day I cannot remember...

2009-02-11T23:07:00.002-07:00

So I figured I'd get this out of the way now so when the day actually came I wouldn't be moping around all depressed like I was when I came home. For those of you who know me, the 1 year mark of me being discharged from the USAF is fast approaching and I honestly don't want it to be here. When July 2nd rolled around last summer, I didn't have time to think "ooo, a year ago today I left for my dream" because I was working and preparing to get slammered (that's slammed and hammered at the same time! =3) in two days at the pool. But this date is different.

Sunday will be one year since I left the Air Force. I have cried, I have picked myself up out of the ashes of what was left of my dignity and self confidence, and once again I am the strong Airman I was a year ago. Mind you I still hate being a civilian, but life is starting to treat me better. For the first time in over a year I am not in pain when I pick up a child or even Frankie (mom's little mini-wiener.). For the first time I can plan and predict my future. For once I can make my own decisions instead of having someone tell me when to breathe, how to walk, or how fast to eat.

Sometimes I feel like I'm losing my training, but then I notice all the small quirks that will never leave me. Like standing at attention when I speak to someone of higher authority... (Pete laughs at me all the time for this.) So I guess I can move on and try to get back in. My shoulder is doing fine. I actually gained 40 degrees ROM since Friday, so I'm proud of that. As soon as I'm allowed to swim, I'm going to start training again so when it's time to go back in, I'll be at 200%. In the mean time, I'll be just fine hanging out with friends.

I do want to have a shout out to "The Cold Soul" and "Air Guard Spouse" for watching my sometime totally inactive blog. =3 I'm surprised you guys even bothered. And "The Cold Soul"? I don't know how it's going to go for you, but the small amount of time I was in the Air Force, it was the best time of my life. I will never ever regret signing away my life to the best branch of the military. If you ever want to contact me via messengers (I have AIM and MSN) don't hesitate. I don't bite.... hard... HAHA!!

Duces.

Midnight Fires

2009-02-08T19:41:00.003-07:00

So I've been wanting to make this AMV (Anime Music Video) for the longest time. Ever since I got my hand on this awesome song. I won't say anymore other than I hope you all enjoy it and please please please comment. =3

I bleed orange and blue...

2009-01-09T01:31:00.002-07:00

Okay, so this season wasn't that bad. A lot better than last season, but that's because I was home =3. ANYWAY, the last game of the season was between Denver and San Diego. Now, Cutler and what's-his-face hate eachother, I mean HAAAATE eachother. They talk smack all the time, and this game was no different. I can't tell you how many times I've almost seen a fight break out on the field because of something the other team says. But what happens on the field stays on the field, right? Apparently not...

I feel sorry for the guy! Talking smack is one thing, but the guy didn't deserve to get beat up. The Broncos just lost! Isn't that a hard enough hit? Apparently not... What do you guys think?

To welcome the new year

2008-12-31T12:43:00.002-07:00

As the New Year rolls ever so closer, It's time to think about the past and the future.

This time last year, I was on leave with my shoulder, but I was happy because I was in the Air Force and I knew that I was making Mom and Dana proud. And then February happened and all went downhill.

Now that I'm getting my life back, it's time to get myself back up to Air Force standards. I know it sounds too early to be thinking about this (I still have 4 years left of schooling), but I need to be able to meet the basic standards so I won't have any trouble going into ROTC. What does this mean for me? Lose weight, start exercising again, and fix my shoulder.

I already have my exercise planned out for the next two months. Something that I can stick to and won't have a problem doing. Something I can do in the middle of work and school. I'm kinda proud of myself. There's very few things that I've stuck to. I guess when it comes to the Air Force, I just really want it.

Anyway, a few of my friends are gonna be doing it with me, so I'm excited. At least I won't be doing it alone. And as much as Mom hates to hear it, I'm going back in. I'm going to serve my country in the branch of service that I love, and no one, not even the United States Air Force, is gonna stop me.

Me and Uncle Sam...

2008-12-24T03:00:00.000-07:00

I'm writing this letter from my barracks
It's Christmas Eve, everything is quiet
It's the only time I don't follow orders
It's the only time that I get to cry

I'm trying to be tough, like my Sergeant
I'm learning how to march and shine my shoes
Six more weeks until graduation
Six more weeks until I see you

Say hello to my sister, give a hug to my Dad
Send a kiss to my Mother, tell that I love her
And to pray when she can, for me...
And Uncle Sam

It's not Christmas when it's Basic Training
You don't think of Santa when you shoot a gun
MRE's don't taste like Mama's turkey
Singing 'Jingle Bells' in a tank ain't no fun

Make sure that Sister helps with dinner
It'd be nice if she covered her tattoo
Tell Dad not to cuss at the table
And to say grace if Mama asks him to

Say hello to my sister, give a hug to my Dad
Send a kiss to my Mother, tell that I love her
And to pray when she can, for me...
And Uncle Sam

That's all for now. I'll be fine, don't worry
I wouldn't have it any other way
I'm proud I get to serve my country
A Soldier fighting for the U.S.A.

Say hello to my sister, give a hug to my Dad
Send a kiss to my Mother, tell that I love her
And to pray when she can, for me...
And Uncle Sam

For me and Uncle Sam...

T_T I went to hell yesterday

2008-12-18T08:20:00.002-07:00

So yesterday I had my MRA/MRI on my shoulder. It wasn't too bad, other than the fact that it HURT LIKE HELL!! The doctor said that my shoulder was one of the most difficult ones he had done because the dye wouldn't go in. How fucked up is that? The staff was all nice, so I can't be mad at them. =3 Afterall, they did everything they could to not make it hurt. Trust me. I had so much litocain in my shoulder I couldn't feel it for half the day. But what should have taken an hour or so took over close to 2 and a half hours.

So today my shoulder is as stiff as hell. And I have to guard this morning. I can't lift it up very high so I'll talk to the manager on duty and see what kind of light work I can do till I have to sit on stand.

And now for something completely different!

18DECO8 - 8th Day of Christmas

So one of my favorite memories was when Cromer and I became Student Leaders. Before he left, SSgt. Cornado had come up to the dorm and completely reeked havoc, renaming a new dorm chief and new element leaders. He was pointing people left and right and I wasn't really paying attention until I hear "WHERE'S MIRACLE?!" Scared half to death, I ran out into the hall with a "Here Sir!" and he pointed at me and said "Your an Element Leader." Quite frankly I was shocked. I held that status till I left on con leave, and quickly got it back when I came back. =3 It was nice having friends in high and scary places.

12 Days of Memories

2008-12-17T11:21:00.002-07:00

So Christmas is gonna be different this year. It's the first Christmas I'll have home since I left for the Air Force. This past year has been.... fast.... Anyway, I'm gonna start something that's gonna keep me posting all the way up till Christmas. The 12 Days of Memories. For every day closer to Christmas, I'll post a GOOD memory from when I was in the Air Force. Kinda as a reminder to me... So I'm gonna back track to the 14th... Here we go!

14DEC08 - 12th Day of Christmas

One of my earliest good memories was when I first went to the 319th. I was scared, didn't know what to do, and was wanting to get out of there and get back to training. Everyone was nice in A2, but what I really remember was going back to the 326 for chow and seeing my flight doing KP duty. I wanted to say hi, wanted to keep in touch, and quite frankly wanted to go back to them. They all saw me and when word go around, I ended up getting a letter from them to take back to the dorm and read. I almost got in trouble with female SSgt. Harris, but I did get back to the dorm with the letter and read it. And I cried. Everyone wished me good luck, and they even got SSgt. Thomas to write in it. Flight 512, I still love you all.

15DEC08 - 11th Day of Christmas

When I was in the 319th, A2 had been my home (well... most of the time anyway). Our dorm chief was Nevarez and she was the most wonderful person ever. But what really made me happy was that SSgt. Green had made A2 his flight office and spent most of the time up there. Everyone really hated him, and he tried to get everyone to hate him, but not me. I first met him when he marched us to chow, and I couldn't help but giggle when his voice cracked as he tried to give us commands. After chow, I was on EC (Entry Controller) when he came up, pounded on the door, and started going berzerk to scare me. Now, I had just come from street flight, knew EC like the back of my hand ("Ma'am/ Sir, may I help you?" "May I see your authority to enter?" "Checking: One white common access card, [Rank] [Name], verifying: one white common access card, [Rank] [Name]. Proceeding with special instructions. Checking for officers: Y/N. Checking for members of the opposite gender: Y/N. Ma'am/ Sir, please step back from the door.") and didn't screw up or crack under the pressure like he had wanted me to. He looked at me, smiled, and went on about his buisness.

16DECOF - 10th Day of Christmas

When I got word that my Dad was sick, I didn't know what do to. So I confided in female SSgt. Harris. She looked at me as I told her the situation, was fighting the tears, and was asking for what I could do. She never said a word until I was finished, and as I stood there stiff as a board at attention, she told me to relax. I went to parade rest and waited for her to say something, and instead of advice and who to contact she said "Miracle. It's okay to cry." I lost it. She hugged me and let me cry, and then told me what I could tell dad, but what really touched me the most was when she told me I could cry.

17DEC08 - 9th Day of Christmas

The one thing I got most while I was in was shit about my name, Miracle. No one could really believe that my last name was Miracle. And I always got "Miracle, like..." so that the instructors could pick on me. Well, out of all of the instructors, SSgt. Green was the funniest. "Miracle? Like 'JESUS FUCKING CHRIST I'M DYING' Miracle?" "..... What?" He just grinned and went about his buisness, picking on Nevarez and some of the old timers in the dorm.

I'm dreaming of a white Christmas...

2008-12-12T22:09:00.002-07:00

So finals are over and the winter hols are coming up. Excited much? Just a bit. My first Christmas since being in the Air Force and quite frankly I'm a little nervous that bad memories are gonna pop up. Last Christmas eve/ Christmas night I was hanging out in CQ with SSgt. Green since I couldn't sleep. He had been helping me through the hols. Also, on Dec. 27th, I finally got to come home for a month. Funny how I can remember exact dates like when I left for BMT, when I got hurt, when I got discharged...

Anyway, just in time for ski season there's a big storm headed our way. I'm excited. I'm hoping that Powderhorn will get enough snow so I can go skiing next weeked (a bit tapped for cash this weekend). I have my skis and my boots, so all I have to do is get my skis realigned with my boots and I'm as good as gold.

And just in time for christmas? This little Marine tid-bit right here.

Finals...

2008-12-04T13:51:00.003-07:00

Rawr, damnit. Finals is next week and my brain hurts. I've been working on projects and assignments around the clock, on top of working and I think I'm about to pass out.... CHRISTMAS BREAK!!! HURRY!!

I know I promised pictures of my kick ass car, and now that I have all of my goodies on it, I'll take pictures. But just... wait a bit, kay? I've gotta get through hell week before I can do anything.

So I'm praying that I can get by with a 2.6 this semester. I need a 2.5 by the end of my freshman year to enroll in the 4 year program, but if I can get it up (one class hit me hard, dude..) I should be good for ROTC come my junior year. I think that's the way I'm gonna go. I don't know how I'm gonna survive with needing a job on top of school and ROTC (how do these college kids do it?) but I'm gonna try.

And yes... The phonebook works....

Yaaaay! =3

2008-11-21T17:27:00.002-07:00

So I finally got my plates for my car today. YAAAAY!! ^-^ I'm so happy! They're the classic Colorado Air Force plates, and they look so coooool! I'll have to get pictures later before we head off to Oklahoma to show ya'll.

*short post*

Oh my god...

2008-11-14T12:29:00.002-07:00

So I was surfing failblog yesterday and I stumbled onto this. I laughed so hard I couldn't breathe... Hehehehe

So why do all of my videos have .jp in the address? -_- Because I'm stuck on the Japanese Youtube server and I can't get off.... I cry...

Letters from War

2008-11-11T15:16:00.002-07:00

She walked to the mailbox
On that bright summers day
Found a letter from her son
In a war far away

He spoke of the weather
And good friends that he'd made
Said I'd been thinking 'bout dad
And the life that he had
Thats why I'm here today
And that the end he said
You are what I'm fighting for
It was the first of the letters from war

She started writing
You're good and you're brave
What a father that you'll be someday
make it home
make it safe

She wrote every night as she prayed

Late in December
A day she'll not forget
Oh her tears stained the paper
With every word that she read

It said "I was up on a hill
I was out there alone
When the shots all rang out
And bombs were exploding
And thats when I saw him
He came back for me
And though he was captured
A man set me free
And that man was your son
He asked me to write to you
I told him i would, oh I swore"
It was the last of the letters from war

And she prayed he was living
Kept on believing
And wrote every night just to say

You are good
And you're brave
what a father that you'll be someday
Make it home
Make it safe
Still she kept writing each day

Then two years later
Autumn leaves all around
A car pulled in the driveway
And she fell to the ground
And out stepped a captain
Where her boy used to stand

He said "mom I'm following orders
From all of your letters
And I've come home again",
He ran into hold her
And dropped all his bags on the floor
Holding all of her letters from war

Bring him home
Bring him home
Bring him home

Change of pace

2008-11-10T21:31:00.002-07:00

So I changed up my layout a bit and called my blog, once again, Air Force Miracles. Why? Well... Because it's a reminder per say. Every time I go to my blog, I want to remind myself why I'm in school, why things happened, and why the good Lord decided to tilt things in my favor. Such as this bit of information...

I was talking to mom the other other day and she had mentioned something Erin had said. She said that because I didn't graduate, I wasn't supposed to get DD214's. Interesting, ne? So with those documents, benefits or not, I'm considered a U.S. Veteran. That actually makes me kinda feel good. Makes me feel like I didn't waste 8 months of my life trying to achieve a still standing dream.

So yea, that's that. Things haven't really changed any... Still going to school and plowing my way through classes. I have a lot of friends now, though, and I'm really glad to say that I have friends. I mean, I'll be sitting at lunch and someone will ask if I wanna go someplace. It makes me feel good =3

And for those of you who keep asking who I voted for.... If you can't figure it out from my last post, than you're a dumbfuck.

Yes, America, We Can

2008-11-06T03:28:00.002-07:00

It was a creed written into the founding documents that declared the destiny of a nation.
Yes we can.

It was whispered by slaves and abolitionists as they blazed a trail toward freedom.
Yes we can.

It was sung by immigrants as they struck out from distant shores and pioneers who pushed westward against an unforgiving wilderness.
Yes we can.

It was the call of workers who organized; women who reached for the ballots; a President who chose the moon as our new frontier; and a King who took us to the mountaintop and pointed the way to the Promised Land.

Yes we can to justice and equality.
Yes we can to opportunity and prosperity.
Yes we can heal this nation.
Yes we can repair this world.
Yes we can.

We know the battle ahead will be long, but always remember that no matter what obstacles stand in our way, nothing can stand in the way of the power of millions of voices calling for change. (We want change.)

We have been told we cannot do this by a chorus of cynics…they will only grow louder and more dissonant ……….. We’ve been asked to pause for a reality check. We’ve been warned against offering the people of this nation false hope.

But in the unlikely story that is America, there has never been anything false about hope.

Now the hopes of the little girl who goes to a crumbling school in Dillon are the same as the dreams of the boy who learns on the streets of LA; we will remember that there is something happening in America; that we are not as divided as our politics suggests; that we are one people; we are one nation; and together, we will begin the next great chapter in the American story with three words that will ring from coast to coast; from sea to shining sea:

Yes We Can.

~President Barack Obama

..... Thanks a lot douche bags.

2008-10-22T15:48:00.004-06:00

CNN Raw video of Grand Junction City Police 'taking care of buisness'.

(CNN) -- Protesters tried to block the motorcade of Republican vice presidential candidate Sarah Palin in Grand Junction, Colorado, on Monday, but police dragged them out of the way.

The incident -- just feet from the car carrying Palin -- was captured on video by CNN affiliate KKCO-TV.

Eight to 10 protesters broke away from a larger group of demonstrators and darted into the street in front of Palin's car just after the first police motorcycles in her motorcade had passed, said Acting Chief Troy Smith of the Grand Junction Police Department.

Wearing bandanas and with their faces covered, the protesters blocked the path and held up a large banner. Officers stopped their motorcycles, grabbed the protesters and dragged several out of the path of the oncoming motorcade.

At least two demonstrators were tackled and forced to the ground before being pulled away. One officer fell backwards into the path of an approaching vehicle but he was able to get out of the way in time.

Palin's vehicle passed without a problem as other protesters chanted on the sidewalk, about a block from a site where Palin had addressed a rally.

Smith said officers saved the protesters from injury because "the motorcade likely would not have stopped" for them. He said "we don't know what their intentions were" in trying to block Palin's motorcade.

Investigators in Grand Junction are reviewing videotapes to try to identify suspects in an "active criminal investigation," Smith said. The Secret Service is not involved in the investigation, he said.

The protesters were members of a group called "Red Pill," Smith said.
A Web site that carried an announcement of the group's planned protest urged supporters to show Palin "that we as a community say no to war, no to corporate cronyism, and no to four more years of Bush-style leadership." It encouraged people to bring "drums, noise makers, and your strength."

So the great city of Grand Junction has now hit national news.... Thanks to these idiots I have to call school-mates.

I share a politics class with one of these protesters and I told him straight to his face that he was a moron. He tried to explain to me that they "intended to get their voice heard," however I clearly explained to him that it didn't matter what his intentions were, the fact of the matter is that they put the lives of three or four police officers and their own lives at risk for a stupid act. Of course he didn't care that he had almost unintentionally killed an officer, but what ever.

I would actually rant more, but maybe you all can understand my frustration just from this... I hate stupid people...

Rules for Non-Military...

2008-10-22T14:29:00.001-06:00

Dear Civilians, 'We know that the current state of affairs in our great nation has many civilians up in arms and excited to join the military. For those of you who can't join, you can still lend a hand. Here are a few of the areas where we would like your assistance:

1. The next time you see any adults talking (or wearing a hat) during the playing of the National Anthem - kick their ass.

2.When you witness, firsthand, someone burning the American Flag in protest - kick their ass.

3.Regardless of the rank they held while they served, pay the highest amount of respect to all veterans. If you see anyone doing otherwise, quietly pull them aside and explain how these veterans fought for the very freedom they bask in every second. Enlighten them on the many sacrifices these veterans made to make this Nation great. Then hold them down while a disabled veteran kicks their ass.

4.(GUYS) If you were never in the military, DO NOT pretend that you were. Wearing battle dress uniforms (BDUs) or Jungle Fatigues, telling others that you used to be 'Special Forces,' and collecting GI Joe memorabilia, might have been okay when you were seven years old. Now, it will only make you look stupid and get your ass kicked.

5.Next time you come across an Air Force member, do not ask them, 'Do you fly a20jet?' Not everyone in the Air Force is a pilot. Such ignorance deserves an ass-kicking (children are exempt).

6.If you witness someone calling the US Coast Guard 'non-military', inform them of their mistake - and kick their ass.

7.Next time Old Glory (the US flag) prances by during a parade, get on your damn feet and pay homage to her by placing your hand over your heart. Quietly thank the military member or veteran lucky enough to be carrying her - of course, failure to do either of those could earn you a severe ass-kicking.

8.Don't try to discuss politics with a military member or a veteran. We are Americans, and we all bleed the same, regardless of our20party affiliation. Our Chain of Command is to include our Commander-In-Chief (CinC). The President (for those who didn't know) is our CinC regardless of political party. We have no inside track on what happens inside those big important buildings where all those representatives meet All we know is that whe n those civilian representatives screw up the situation, they call upon the military to go straighten it out. If you keep asking us the same stupid questions repeatedly, you will get your ass kicked!

9.'Your mama wears combat boots' never made sense to me - stop saying it! If she did, she would most likely be a vet and therefore could kick your ass!

10. bin Laden and the Taliban are not Communists, so stop saying 'Let's go kill those Commies!' And stop asking us where he is! Crystal balls are not standard issue in the military. That reminds me- if you see anyone calling those damn psychic phone numbers, let me know, so I can go kick their ass!

11. 'Flyboy' (Air Force), 'Jarhead' (Marines), 'Grunt' (Army), 'Squid' (Navy), 'Puddle Jumpers' (Coast Guard), etc., are terms of endearment we use describing each other. Unless you are a service member or vet, you have not earned the right to use them.. Using them could get your ass kicked.

12. Last, but not least, whether or not you become a member of the military, support our troops and their families. Every Thanksgiving and religious holiday that you enjoy with family and friends, please remember that there are literally thousands of soldiers, sailors, marines and airmen far from home wishing they could be with their families. Thank God for our military and the sacrifices they make every day. Without them, our country would get it's ass kicked.'

'It's the Veteran, not the reporter who has given us the freedom of the press.'
'It's the Veteran, not the poet, who has given us the freedom of speech.'
'It's the Veteran, not the campus organizer, who gives us the freedom to demonstrate.'
'It's the Military who salutes the flag, who serves beneath the flag, and whose coffin is draped by the flag, who allows the protester to burn the flag.'

One more:
13. If you ever see anyone either standing for or singing the national anthem in Spanish - KICK THEIR ASS.

ONE MORE:
If you got this email and didn't pass it on - guess what - you deserve to get your ass kicked!

Obama Llama Song

2008-10-05T21:06:00.001-06:00

Broncos Country!

2008-09-25T07:59:00.003-06:00

So yesterday, the Denver Broncos finally declared Grand Junction as Broncos Country. They had a big thing at Stoker Stadium, so guess who went to it.... ME!!! =3 It was so much fun. Billy Thompson, one of the big names in the "Ring of Fame" at Invesco Field was there. He was on the Broncos from the time it started in 1961 to 1986 when he retired. Over 20 years on the Denver Broncos!

I got his autograph and was able to sign the Broncos Country flag that will be flying over Invesco Field at Mile High. While I was there, I even got vido footage. Do you wanna see? =3 I know you do! Without further adue, I present to you...

Grand Junction is Broncos Country!

Do you remember?

2008-09-11T09:24:00.003-06:00

Do you remember where you were when the 9/11 terrorist attacks happened? Were you at work, siting in front of your computer doing a meaningless cubical job? Were you buying groceries for the week? Were you watching your younger children while the older ones were at school?

At 8:46am, American Airlines flight 11 hit the North Tower. At 9:03 am, United flight 175 hit the South Tower. 9:30 am, Flight 77 hit the Pentagon, and at 10:06 am United flight 93 crash landed in a field near Shanksville PA.

So, I say again, do you remember where you were at?

People say that every generation has their major tragedy. The generation before mine had JFK's murder and the Challenger accident. Mine is 9/11. I remember exactly where I was when it all happened.

I had just walked into the library at J. Frank Faust Jr. High School when I noted that the TV was on. The librarian had said not to watch the TV, but I didn't listen. I watched the TV, and all I saw was a big building on fire. My friend Kate and I sat there in awe, not quite sure what the hell was going on. And then the second tower was hit. As soon as that happened, we were put under lockdown, unable to leave the classroom or the school. After the Pentagon was hit, the principal came over the PA system.

"Attention students and faculty of Faust. There has been a terroristic attack in New York City and D.C. Don't worry, Faust is in no danger."

How did he know? Within a 50 mile radius of Chambersburg, there was Site R, Camp David, Army War College, a large ammunition depot... How the fuck did he know we weren't in danger?

Two hours after United flight 93 crashed in Shanksville, I was home and in the arms of my (though very tired) Mother.

So..... Do you remember where you were, what you were doing, what had been said and what you were feeling? I do. And some days I wish I don't.

I really am Water

2008-09-10T13:47:00.001-06:00

what element are you? Fire, Water, Air, Earth, Light, Dark
created with QuizFarm.com

You scored as Water

You are water. Calm, soothing, you also have your bad side. When you lose you temper, things get broken- but that rarely happpens.

Water

100%

Dark

88%

Earth

75%

Fire

63%

Light

50%

Air

38%

X3

2008-09-10T09:08:00.001-06:00

I'm 21 now! YAAAAAAAAAY!

Politics...

2008-09-05T14:22:00.004-06:00

That's right Obama, you got this. Lol, so I've been following the presidential elections oh so very closely. I mean, it does help a little bit that I am in American Government and my major is Political Science. ANYWAY, I'm a firm supporter of Obama and Biden. I mean, personally, I think they would do some real good for this country. Afterall we need change. But just because I'm a democrat doesn't mean that I didn't watch the RNC....

WHAT. THE. FUCK?!

Seriously, I don't know what the hell the republicans are doing. I mean, what the hell is going on in their heads? Are they even on Earth anymore? First Palin gets on the ticket, and then all they do is attack the Democrats? And on TOP of that, McCain tries to take Obama's "change" tatic. I'm sorry but Bush had a better campaign than McCain. At least he had something to run on. All McCain has is that Obama isn't ready to lead... Oi vey.

I hate to say this, but I think God was trying to tell the republican party something. I mean, here comes Gustav on the first day of the RNC which just so happens to be the 3 year anniversary to the day of Katrina, which in turn was the Bush administration's biggest flop, which in TURN McCain said he wouldn't change anything from.... See a connection here? So I say it again.

What are they doing?!

Now that both canidates have accepted their nominations, I want to see what happens in November. The latest thing from the McCain ticket is that people (mostly the SEVERELY conservitives) are musing the fact that McCain has a BLACK (i repeat: BLACK) daughter. While I say good for him, another child has a home, the racists are going WTF. So if you think about it, either way a black person is going to be in office. Does this mean that Ron Paul is actually going to get some votes? I'm gonna laugh if Ron Paul, an Independant, gets office.

Ah, the humor in American Politics....

25 random facts about me

2008-08-29T12:14:00.002-06:00

Okay.... I'm doing this because mommy did this. Here goes nothing...

1. I was in the Air Force.

2. I love Japanese Anime and Manga, my favorite series being Hagane no Renkujitsu (Fullmetal Alchemist)

3. I'm currently attending Mesa State College, the college my mom went to.

4. I'm closer to my Mom than anyone else. <3

5. I've been a lifegaurd since December of 2006.

6. I'm a dual certified lifeguard (Ellis and Red Cross)

7. I'm taking 16 credit hours this semester and I still feel great.

8. I've been building websites since I was in 3rd or 4th grade

9. I was introduced to the internet in 2nd grade

10. I was banned from using the computer in the Tech. Ed wing in Jr. High (they were apple computers. Me and apple computers don't cooperate)

11. In my lifetime, there are only two guys I feel that I have ever "loved," and I talk to both of them every day.

12. I've been teaching myself Japanese since 2000.

13. I hate stupid people.

14. I hate cars.

15. I hate needles.

16. I have never done any illegal drugs.

17. The first time I had alcohol was at the 2006 football season superbowl. And it wasn't beer. =3 It's was this pink fruity Cap'n Morgan drink.

18. My favorite color is blue.

19. My favorite animal are cats and kittens, much to my mother's dismay.

20. I am proud to be a geek/nerd.

21. I have gone to a total of 5 Anime conventions

22. My first anime was Sailor Moon and Speed Racer

23. I still love Sailor Moon

24. I'm good with kids, apparently. Parents like how I teach swimming lessons.

25. I love to sing. All day, every day.

That's it. Hope you liked it.

So it's been a week

2008-08-26T10:24:00.003-06:00

So it's been a week since school started and I'm actually enjoying myself. It's a lot better than highschool, though the fact that I get sick easily hasn't changed. I've already got a cold, but I don't think that sitting in catch tank Friday night and all Saturday helped me any. Oh, yea, the slide at Lincoln Park is open now. And I got a cold. I'm so excited... -_- Not.

Anyway, I'm really enjoying most of my classes. The only one I don't like is music appreciation, but at least it's the only time I'll take it. The next year and a half is gym, I think.... -_- Oh well, you win some you lose some. I've really gotta catch up on my readings and what not. But I also wanna finish my cosplay for Friday. =3 At AniMeSa, we can cosplay during meetings!! I'M SO EXCITED!! =3 That also means I need to get just a little bit more fabric, but that's okay. It's not too much.

Better pack up and get ready for class now. DUCES!!

Sho...

2008-08-18T12:00:00.002-06:00

I've started my first day of college. Here I am, sitting at the Cafe with my laptop, some pizza, and coffee and..... ZOMG IT'S AWESOME!! I've already me a lot of new people and what not, and I've also seen a few of my friends from work. =3 I'm actually having fun. And here I thought I would be scared... HAH!!

So anyway, short post. I got homework to do.... DUCES!!

I'm a lifeguard...

2008-08-11T18:50:00.004-06:00

So the end of summer finally approaches us. School starts next Monday in which I am so uuber excited. But I do have on minor problem. I am a lifeguard, and I have proof.

This is what happens when you spend 8 hours in the sun every day for three months straight with the same cut swimsuit. You get the "OMG DOES SHE EVER GO INSIDE?!" tan. I would also like to mention that my ASS is half brown, half cracker-white. Every time I go out and wear shorts, mom laughs at me because my legs are brown. =3 So I wear jeans. It's not that I don't like my tan. I actually love it, since for once I am darker than my own mother, but it goes 'brown brown brown CRACKER ASS WHITE brown brown brown.'

Anyway, as I said before, classes start next Monday. I'm actually excited, even though it's been two years since I was last in school. Maybe now I won't kill myself everytime a project comes up. (HAH!!) I'll still have my job at the pool. Lincoln Park is open until September 1st, and Orchard Mesa is open all year round, so I'll just switch over to the other pool. There's a lot of people who quit for the school year, but most of my friends (Theron, Marshall, and Mike to just mention a few) are gonna be here for the winter. =3 Yay. And.... NO MORE ADAM THE DOUCHE BAG!! MUWAHA!!!

.... I will not get into the rant about Adam. It is not for virgin eyes to see.

So that's about it. Not much till school starts. =3 Duces.

=3

2008-08-07T09:13:00.000-06:00

It's raining right now.

I'm so excited.

=3

Ano....

2008-08-02T11:31:00.003-06:00

I am soooooooooo sorry for not posting for almost a month! Life has been busy. There's so much to say in so little space, so I'm gonna break it down for you all so it doesn't seem to blend into one... Sorry if I sound all weird in this post. My brain broke yesterday...

WORK - I've been working non-stop, though things have been better. I actually had a parent complain about my teaching style (insecure much?) but I had a parent beg me to take her kid into my class. So things worked out. I'm strapped for cash because of my big buy for this paycheck. I needed it. But otherwise... yea, summer's almost done. I'm excited. Hopefully it'll start cooling down some.

NAVY - I've decided not to go into the Navy. As much as I want to be in the military, it hurts me to put on a different uniform. People don't join a branch just to serve. I joined the Air Force because I wanted to be in the Air Force. It's that simple.

MSC - Yes, I have decided to start up school again. I'll be going to Mesa State College. Hopefully my first day will be the 18th, if I can get all my shit together by then. I bought a Sony Vaio with my paycheck so I could take good notes during school. Right now I'm working on customizing it. Hopefully it'll be done by the end of the weekend. So I'm actually a little excited to be going back to school. =3 A lot of my friends from work will be going to Mesa, so that's good.

That's about it. I'll try to remember to update this thing more than 4 times a month. -_- I am so bad at blogging...

Duces!

Lifeguards say what?

2008-07-10T09:11:00.002-06:00

So some of you wanted to know what my lifeguard lingo was in my last post. Well, I decided to make up a small dictionary of lingo we use at our two facilities. =3 I hope you guys remember this post, you'll have to reference it a lot through the rest of the summer.

Chaumba - Basically it's just the Lifetube. A guard called it a 'Chaumba' a long time ago, and the name just stuck...

DKG rescue - A rescue that uses "If you don't know, Go" philosphy

Fanny - The fannypacks guards use to carry their rescue mask.

LTS - Learn to Swim. Almost every lifeguard is also a swimming teacher =3

Near/far - The chair rotations we use. "Near" chairs (Near LTS, Near Shallow, Near Deep, Slide) are the closest chairs to the guard room. "Far" chairs (Splash, Far LTS, Far Shallow, Far Deep) are the farthest chairs from the guard room.

Spinal - Any rescue that deals with an injury to the head, neck, or back.

Vat - A dummy used to patice activating the Emergancy Action Plan (EAP). We have to go after it and treat it like a real rescue.

I hope this helps all of you non-lifeguards out there!

I R BLONDE!!

2008-07-06T12:30:00.002-06:00

As you can see in the picture, I am now a blonde.... And Max love to dance, lol. Because I work so much at Lincoln Park, my hair was starting to bleach out from the chlorine and the sun, so I decided to just go ahead and change it. And boy does it look good. They're highlights, heavy highlights mind you, but it looks soooooooooooooo freaking awesome. I LOVE IT!!

And you know what else is so freaking awesome? Rock Band. I bought the whole thing the other day: drums, game, guitar, and mic. Haven't tried the guitar yet, but I can say that the drums are my all time favorite thing about the game. Tonight, I'm gonna try to get Mom and Dana playing the game, see how good we are as a band. I'm totally the drummer though. =3 That's my forte.

Work's been going somewhat alright. It's a little bumpy right now since I failed a vat (my timing was perfect, but my chaumba slipped off, so I fail. -_- What a load of bullshit... IT DOESN'T EVEN GO DOWN 13 FEET!!!) so sometime this week I'm gonna be vated again. 5 failed vats means I lose my job. And this is AFTER I had 3 rescues.... WTF?! Seriously people... Anyway.... The 4th was good. Kaylyn and I spent it together shootin' off fireworks at the hospital with Roy (the security guard), and it was fun. Everyone came out to watch. So now it's my weekend off, yay, and I'm gonna see if we can do something fun today... like go to Mesa Verde or something. Hmmmm..... *evil grin* MOMMY!!! Lol. Duces!!

I am an American Soldier

2008-07-04T14:26:00.001-06:00

I'm just trying to be a father,
Raise a daughter and a son,
Be a lover to their mother,
Everything to everyone.
Up and at 'em bright and early,
I'm all in my business suit,
Yeah, I'm dressed for success from my head down to my boots,
I don't do it for money, there's still bills that I can't pay,
I don't do it for the glory, I just do it anyway,
Providing for our future's my responsibility,
Yeah I'm real good under pressure, being all that I can be,
And I can't call in sick on Mondays when the weekends been to strong,
I just work straight through the holidays,
And sometimes all night long.
You can bet that I stand ready when the wolf growls at the door,
Hey, I'm solid, hey I'm steady, hey I'm true down to the core,
And I will always do my duty, no matter what the price,
I've counted up the cost, I know the sacrafice,
Oh, and I don't want to die for you,
But if dyin's asked of me,
I'll bear that cross with an honor,
'Cause freedom don't come free.
I'm an american soldier, an american,
Beside my brothers and my sisters I will proudly take a stand,
When liberty's in jeopardy I will always do what's right,
I'm out here on the front lines, sleep in peace tonight.
American soldier, I'm an American,
An American,
An American Soldier

FAIL!!

2008-07-03T22:54:00.001-06:00

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

In My Eyes...

2008-06-29T20:14:00.002-06:00

Hey everyone!! Just taking a minute to totally pimp my photo blog called In My Eyes... Basically I just wanted to have a blog so I can put up some sort of "art" when I don't have time to draw or write. I hope you all don't mind watching another blog, lol. =3 Have fun. DUCES!!

True Heros...

2008-06-25T14:07:00.003-06:00

That's right. =3 They wear uniforms! There's a difference! Basically this post is about by two rescues (let's hope there's not one today) in the past two days. One a day, yep...

June 24th: So I'm down in the deep end when I say this kid with goggles on. I kindly ask him to take them off, and he starts to argue with me about how he needs them to swim... FOR 15 MINUTES!!! I eventually get fed up with him and told him to go to the shallow end. after watching a couple kids go off the diving boards, I see him cutting across the middle of the middle of the lap lanes. Me and the near shallow guard move to yell at him, but since I was there first and saw that he was going under, I blew one long (to start the EAP) and went in after him. And when I got to him.... HE TRIED TO FIGHT ME!!! Let's just say that we soon found out the kid was a bit 'slow' and hated to listen to adults... =_= Oh joy of joys.

June 25th: Once again, I'm at the deep end when I'm watching this girl go off the high dive. She does a front flip and almost hits the board, and I think 'I'll talk to her when she comes out.' That didn't get to happen because I was telling some kids to get off the back wall. Then, something inside of me tells me to look up. I look up, watch her do a back flip, and HIT THE HIGH DIVE. I wasn't sure what she hit, so I blew one long and went in. Met her half way, grabbed her, and asked her what she hit. She said she hit her back, and so I made her sit and stabilized her when I heard two long. Next thing I know, my boss, Marshall, and Theron are there and I'm in a lot of pain because of adrenalin and holding this girl still for a half hour. Medics came and took her and my boss didn't let me work for an hour.

Whoo... So today I don't wanna work. I don't wanna do another rescue because I really really don't wanna get wet today.... *sigh* oh well...

Anime Otaku UNITE!!!

2008-06-21T14:10:00.004-06:00

So I'm not the only Anime freak in Grand Junction. =3 I work with 3 others. Alex, Kaylyn, and Matt (young Matt) are all anime freaks just like me and we have this nice little circle going on. And to stop it off, Barnes and Nobel have a new anime club starting TODAY!! Matt and I are going, so I'm gonna be a geek and wear my 'will work for anime' t-shirt to it.

..... Wait a minute.... I AM WORKING FOR ANIME!!! WTF MATE?!

I'll update this when I get back. =3 Duces!

EDIT: The club was a BLAST!! All we really did was sit there and talk, but it was so much fun.. I totally cannot WAIT till next month!!

The Lincoln Park Vortex

2008-06-16T21:55:00.003-06:00

I am so sorry I haven't made a blog in forever. I've been so fucking busy with work that it ain't funny. I love my job, but I think I'm overworking myself. Even my manager said I was working too much so maybe I should lay back a bit... >_> Anyway, I'm making so many good friends. Marshall and Devin are like my all time best friends though. And Alex and Kaylyn are my anime geek friends. BUT!!! This post isn't about how much I love my work. It's about.... dun dun DUN!!

THE LINCOLN PARK VORTEX!!!

That's right folks! A tornado-like phenomena hit the pool yesterday. Theron and I were guarding the deep end when the winds started picking up. I was like "YES!! WIND!!" because it was well into the 100's yesterday, when I turned to look at the water. It was.... well, in the air and twisting. By the time Theron saw it, it moved off of water and onto the deck and we lost it. Well... that is until it hit the stacks of chairs. Theron goes "Oh shit..." as the chairs were picked up and flown across the deck, getting stuck in trees and hitting people. So he bolts, leaving me to get all the kids (who are now climbing everywhere going 'WHAT'S HAPPENING?!) off of the diving boards and push them against the back building wall incase this thing decides to come around again and hit us. Pete and Zion, our managers for the day, FLY out of the lobby to go see what happened. Thankfully no one was hurt and the day finished smoothly, but wow.

I wonder if anything cool will happen like that today. =3

Epic FAIL

2008-05-31T22:02:00.004-06:00

Talk about an epic FAIL. So I've been working since last Sunday. Meaning everyday. Meaning tomorrow is my first official day off before the next work week begins. I'm pretty excited for tomorrow. =3 I get to.... *gasp* SLEEP!!! ZOMG!!! Wondering why I have a picture of my feet? Notice the tan lines and the sunburn? EPIC FAIL!! This is just proof of my lifeguarding, as now I have flip-flop tan lines, board shorts tan lines, and rolled-sleeve t-shirt tan lines. I am starting to get pretty dark though. I'm sure that by the end of June, I'll be pretty tan. And to think that I work at Lincoln Park all fucking summer, while getting pickup hours at Orchard Mesa. I'm having fun though. You never know how much you missed doing something until you start it again. And I can safely say that I missed being a lifeguard. =3 I also have some updated pics for ya'll. LIFEGARD POWERS ACTIVATE!!!

Yes, my beautiful uniform that I wear every time I work. It's kinda cute, actually. I love the little stick dude on the back. =3 Says "Life is good. Lifeguarding is good. We do what we love. We love what we do." Totally true too! I say it everyday that my job is the best job in the world. Well.... Besides being in the military. Anyway, I'm tired, and I'm gonna play a bit before I go to bed. Deuces!

drool

2008-05-30T23:08:00.003-06:00

See that kitteh up there? That's what I'm gonna be doing tonight when I fall asleep. Besides the first week of BMT, I have never been so exhausted in my life. Seriously.... You people don't know what it's like babysitting half of the town in 90 degree heat. Well.... Maybe Mom does.... BUT SHE GETS AC!! I DON'T!! HA!!

Anyway, we had an 'event' at Lincoln Park today. A city-wide pool party celebrating the beginning of summer. Whoot. So it was uuber busy. And then I had to man a birthday party with a whole bunch of little 12 year old girls. Needless to say I am glad to be home tonight. Tomorrow will hopefully be the ONLY Saturday I ever work. I'm lucky enough to get weekends off this summer, so yay. And now it's time to drool...

Hey! I got a joke!

2008-05-29T00:16:00.004-06:00

How many lifeguards does it take to open a door? Three to struggle with the key and one to punch it open! And it wasn't even locked!! =D

We are a sad sad excuse for emergency personnel. I mean, real sad. So today was free day at Lincoln Park Moyer Pool. It was pretty busy, and I'm surprised since JUCO was still going on. Anyway, I like the crew I'm working with. Everyone is freakin funny. But yea, the door story? So we finished cleaning the deck about halfway through the day, and me along with Dante (a newbie), Natasha (one of the cool girls), Estella (another cool girl), and Devin (another newbie) were thirsty. I mean, working at a pool makes someone thirsty. So we tried to get into the guard room to get water and we couldn't open the door. How sad is that? Devin had to punch it to get it to open.

I love my job. I loved it when I worked at the YMCA, and I love it here. I can't stop lifeguarding. It's in my blood, I guess. =3 So I'll be a lifeguard till I leave for the Navy. IF I leave for the Navy, hopefully the Air Force won't screw around with it. I need to take a camera to work one day, get pictures of everyone..... XD

Apparently...

2008-05-23T13:33:00.002-06:00

...Civilians think that I'm unfit for military service. After work, I had stopped by the Navy office to talk to Adam. He got the papers back from the MEPS doctor and they said that I was "permanently disqualified due to adjustment disorder".

....

....

....

WHAT THE FUCKING HELL IS ADJUSTMENT DISORDER?!

Seriously!! Holy freaking crap, taller freaking tap! Unable to adjust to military life? I adjusted just fine, it just that THEY wanted to fucking screw around with me! Listen up, world.... YOU DON'T FUCK WITH ME IF YOU DON'T WANNA SUFFER!! My totally great and awesome mother taught me how to fend for myself, and my.... father.... gave me my short fuse and temper. I will raise hell if I have to. Trust me, this isn't the last they've seen of Breanna Danielle Miracle.

Anyway, I had to write a written statement saying that no, I did not have a problem adjusting to military life, and no, it wasn't my fault they discharged me. He's doing everything he can to get me in, and I thank everyone in that office. Even Collin, who I never see. =3

Rawr.... So yea, finally got hired. Whoot. Got my uniform and everything. =3 I look pretty snazzy as a lifeguard. And, my volunteering, I was able to pick up an extra 36 hours for my first paycheck. So I'll have like... a whole extra 40 hours on it. Teh Awesome. I think I'm gonna like working for the city. I work mostly at the outdoor pool, so hours are gonna be weather depending, but overall I think it'll be cool. And I get to teach swimming lessons again. Booyah bitches!

Okay, I'm done ranting... Now I'm hungry.... foooooooooooooooooooooood..........

Bad boy bad boy, whatcha gonna do?

2008-05-08T15:21:00.006-06:00

Okay, so I was just sitting in my room, minding my own business, when suddenly I hear "Get the fuck off of me right now or I'll fucking kill you!!" and I went ping!! That's not good.... So I peek out the window and two guys are on the ground, one's holding the other down. The first thing I did was run tell Dana that he needed to call the police.

So he did and sure enough here comes the Sheriff. So much excitement!! So yet, they let both dudes go and that was about the end of it. A lot of talking and yelling. The medics came for a bloody nose. And that's it. =3 Still so much excitement!!

Deb had asked why I joined the military. It's really hard for me to explain. I guess 9/11 is a bit of a factor, and then the fact that most of the men from my Mom's side of the family was military. I love my Mom so much... And of course I can get a whole bunch of loves of lolz!!

The real reason? Because it's my turn to serve my country. That's it. Nothing heroic or anything... It's just my turn...

Anyway, time to have fun with friends online. Ja ne!

I am a very angry and bitter person

2008-05-05T03:40:00.002-06:00

Wow, a new blog post so quick... I have to get this off my chest because if I don't, I won't be able to sleep and I'll go back to the way I was when I came home...

This all started when I was watching TV with Mom. Drawing a picture, minding my own business, then this commercial came on. It was called 'Why I Serve' and they were interviewing a retired Air Force MSGT. I looked up when he began to talk, and I couldn't pull my eyes away. All I could think about was that could have been me and Needless to say I started sobbing. Because it's moments like these where I realize that everything I have worked so hard for, everything that I had sacrificed and ended, my whole why wasn't I able to achieve that?REASON for being the way I am was stripped away from me in less than 24 hours...

I was going to be an Airman.

I was going to be the best the Air Force had to offer.

I lived USAF, I breathed USAF.

And now here I am, back to square one...

I'm trying so hard to turn off the Air Force and turn on the Navy. I want to make Mom and Dana proud again. I want to satisfy the fighter in me... But it's getting harder every day. I hate waking up in the mornings. I hate it. Because I wake up to reality. Because in my dreams I'm still at Lackland, still fighting to go back, still proudly wearing my name and U.S. Air Force on my chest. And when I wake up, it's gone. It was just a dream, a memory, a nightmare. And I want to cry every single time I even remotely think about the Air Force.

I'm trying so hard to press forward and to use what I've learned to benefit me. But it's so hard... I feel like I can't take it anymore, that if I could just go back in time and hide my pains for just a bit longer... I try not to think about it. I try to put a smile on my face and not worry the people around me because I don't want the whole world to worry about me. But it's hard... And it hurts...

I just wanna go back...

What are you expecting when you get home?

2008-05-04T15:22:00.003-06:00

So here I am, sick as a dog, watching Carrier and laughing my ass off. I hope I get on a ship like the USS Nemitz. It looks so much fun, and everyone is a family. And I just have to get this quote off before I forget it.

"So what are you expecting when you get home?"
"..... I'm expecting unyeilded sex, Ma'am, what do you think I'm expecting?"

As much as I love the Air Force, I can't help but think I'll be so much better off in the Navy. The people seem so much more... normal than they did in the Air Force. I mean, you either love it or hate it. I don't think there's a middle ground. It'll be hard. Not phsyically, but mentally, because I'm going to have to retrain myself. I'm going to have to flush out the Air Force to let the Navy get in... But if I can do it for the Air Force, I can do it for the Navy. It's as simple as that.

*shrugs* So yea.... anyway... This show Carrier is really good. I'm watching the last episode while downloading it on ITunes. The pilots are coming home. It makes me wanna cry. *snort* Now some guy and his wife are bitching at eachother while doing the tango. It's great. So yea... That's about it. Excuse me while I writhe in pain.

Blarg...

2008-05-03T15:14:00.002-06:00

So I've been trying to keep myself from getting in trouble for a while. Last weekend I had my lifeguard training and let me till you, Ellis is sooooooooooooo much better than Red Cross. I'm sorry, but there's just so many details that Red Cross doesn't cover that Ellis does. However, it sucks trying to do your practical exam with a sprained ankle. Yes... I was dumb enough to sprain my ankle while coming off the steps. -_- yay me.

Anyway, I have inservices between now and the 18th. I'll pick and choose which ones to go to so I don't hurt myself again. I should be working by the end of this month, but who knows. On top of doing lifeguard stuff and listening to Mom talk about the VA being too slow, I've been doing a ton of art projects for people. Of course I do mine for free when I should be making people pay, but whatever.

Been cranky lately too. Might be because everyone in the world is starting to get on my nerves. I hate people. I hate civilian life... Rawr...

That's about it. Figured I would update and then crawl into my hole in the wall again. I wonder if I could get paid to be a hermit.... hmmmmm....

And that's the way it is

2008-04-16T01:33:00.002-06:00

So I wanted to do something for Mom and Dana for the longest time, something like a thank you for all of the support and the motivation that keeps me going each day. And Mom's nagging.... ANYWAY I spent the last couple hours making this. Mom will probably kill me for using these pictures, but oh well. I love you mom!! =3

It was straight out of CSI!

2008-04-12T01:32:00.005-06:00

Oh.... My..... God.... So, what a trip. First of all, I would just like to gloat about the picture you see to the right.... THIS IS ME AND MY TWO CHIPPENDALES!!! HAHAHAHA!!! =3 I'm sorry, I'm just a happy hyper little girl. The Vegas trip was awesome. It was nice to actually go somewhere and have fun, even though my legs started hurting after the first day. I think I got a charle horse or something that wouldn't go away. -_- They still hurt. Anyway, the point was to have fun. I played a ton of DDR, ate a lot of food (I gained *cry* so I'm gonna have to go on a strict diet starting tomorrow), and got a ton of really cool stuff. Let's see here... I got:

Japanese Sushi Plate Set
Cute silk skirt
Awesome sunglasses
The Life of Brian DVD for Dana
Candy from FAO Swartz
m&m's and despencer from m&m world
and a few stuffed animals won at the Midway

And of course I gambled. What's a few months between birthdays anyway, ne? I'm very happy with the trip, and I'll go back in a heart beat. Never did get to show off my swimsuit. Oh well, better luck next time.

Viva Las Vegas

2008-04-09T01:31:00.002-06:00

Oh my god. A real blog post. So here I am sitting on my bed while talking to Eric and listening to Mom and Dana snore. Hi Eric! Hi... Anyway, this Vegas trip has been fucking awesome. I'm "21" so I gamble on the slots with Mom and Dana. I've used Dana as my table player, but they didn't like it. So I stick to the slots and video poker. =3 I've won a total of (around) 25 bucks. Yay me. So yea, having fun.

This is only ment to be a short post. When I get home, I'll make a list of what I got here when I get home after a couple days of rest. Right now I'm just gonna finish my conversation with Eric so that I can try to go to sleep with Mom and Dana singing their Snoring Symphony.

Hiya Barbie...

2008-03-29T15:24:00.001-06:00

I'm a barbie girl!
In a barbie world!
Heavy plastic,
It's fantastic!
You can brush my hair!
And dress me everywhere!
Imagination,
Life is your creation!!

Can you say ORM?

2008-03-29T01:14:00.002-06:00

And this would be why I'm going into the Navy and not the Marines. As the Chief would say... Silly grunts.

Crank it!

2008-03-27T01:08:00.002-06:00

YOU!!!! ...... Uh, yea. So I'm actually making a real post. I was gonna post something about how I'm really tired about all these kids asking me if I killed someone once they found out I was in the Air Force, but then I watched youtube. It made me happy.

I <3 youtube!!

And because my mother bugs me to update this damn this, I decided to show you something I thought was awesome. Crank that Soldier Boy, Marines!!!

>_>

2008-03-26T16:05:00.001-06:00

Rawr.

We can do it!

2008-03-19T23:51:00.002-06:00

We can do it! We can do it! We can make our dreams come true!

Hah, at least I think I can. This whole Navy thing is starting to scare me, and with as much hell I went though trying to get into the Air Force, and now seeing how easy it's been trying to get into the Navy... The Chief wants me to go to Salt Lake next week (whoot.) to do my phsyical and take the DLAB. I'm totally freaking out. And I know I shouldn't. I'm doing just fine.

I passed my PT eval, I'm giving him all the papers he needs, it's like "Can you do this?" "Done." It's that fucking simple!! And if you can't tell, I'm starting to get into this whole Navy thing. Tomorrow I plan on swimming (hopefully) and working out at Mesa. I need to get my situps up to par and that.... I also wanna go to Vegas soon.... Damnit.... Mother making me wait till next month.... RAWR!!!

So I'm just chillin'. I'm gonna work on my novel some and hopefully a doujinshi for my friends. And I need to work on me Japanese. It'll help me in the long run, I think.

Who the hell do I have to fuck to get somewhere in life?

2008-03-16T17:03:00.002-06:00

I am an angry person...

I am a very angry and bitter person...

You all want to know how i'm feeling? I'll fucking tell you how I'm fucking feeling....

I HATE BEING A GODDAMN MOTHER FUCKING CIVILIAN!!!

I've been home for a month now. Just a month. And I'm more stressed out and frustrated than I've ever been. I would rather be sitting my ass at the squadron than be trying to juggle everything I am right now. I'm trying to get a job, applied for college, signing up for the navy, dealing with family, babysiting the damn dogs, excersising, losing weight, trying to keep myself sane I AIN'T GOT THE TIME TO BE PLEASING EVERY FUCKING SOUL THAT CROSSES MY DAMN PATH!!! I was so much happier sitting and waiting in a med hold squadron than I am being a civilian.

And it doesn't help that I want to be in the Air Force more than ever but instead I'm going into the Navy. I like what they offer. I like what the Chief is trying to do for me and everything, but... It's not the same... It's not the Air Force... I don't think Mom understands, and it's hard for me to explain. Once you've worn one uniform and have been proud in that uniform, it is very very hard to commit yourself to a different uniform. Yes, we're all the United States Military, yes we're all brothers and sisters in arms.... But the Army is different than the Marines. The Navy is different than the Air Force.

It's driving me insane. Maybe this is depression. Maybe this is PTSD. Hell I don't fucking know and I really don't fucking care. I just wanna..... I just wanna be happy...

Is that really too much to ask for?

So...

2008-03-10T02:05:00.002-06:00

Mom's been bugging me to update this thing. I told her that I don't think much, which isn't true but sometimes I wish it was. Anyway, I'm doing what I do best thanks to the USAF: I'm waiting. Tomorrow, hopefully, I'll nail some of the country clubs around here to see if I can get a lifeguard job. Which I need. I'm on my last 100 dollars and I'm saving that for college applications. Like that's gonna be enough, but what are you gonna do, ya know?

Anyway, right now I'm teaching myself to play the piano. It's soothing. I don't know how many people know this, but music is a big big big part of my life. I have not gone a day without some sort of music. Even when I'm just sitting doing nothing, there's music playing in my head. So to be able to make music with my fingers, it makes me happy. I think this is one of the few "happy" moments I've had since I've been home. I mean, not that I'm not happy being with Mom and Dana, it's just.... You know... I hate this life. It's horrible. It's so unorganized and easy to get lost in... Like right now, I can easily slip into what I was trained back in the Air Force, but when I do, people look at me strange. I called a clerk at F.Y.E. "ma'am" and she looked at me like I was some sort of freak. Really, is that how we act nowadays people? My generation is going down the shitter...

So, I updated my blog. It's 0224 and I'm far from being tired. All of my friends are offline, so I think I'll play the piano a bit before I go to bed. I'll take pictures of my new bedroom once I get my laundry and music off the floor.

To all of the AF mom's and dad's that read this: I'm praying for your children. Wether they be in BMT, tech school, or the operational Air Force. May the good lord be with them. And back them up whenever life decides to get in the way. You don't know how much it helps to have just one person believe in you.

Hokay... So...

2008-02-26T15:05:00.002-07:00

I now have two really good options here...

1.) AFROTC - I talked to Capt. Anderson today and he said it looks really good for me to be able to get into AFROTC and commission back into the Air Force. YAY ME!! =3 I still have a chance! I can do the studying, the drills, the PT.... I can do all that. Go me. Let's just hope that HQ decides to approve it.

2.) U.S. Navy - ZOMG, I like what I'm hearing here. The only thing that bothers me is the fact that I don't know any Naval history and stuff... So I'll have to start from square one. But, I can do it. If I can do it for the Air Force, I can do it for the Navy.

I'm still trying to make a decision. I won't know about AFROTC till the end of march at the latest. That's fine. I'm trying to get a job anyway, so I can wait a little bit. I'll get my application into CSU and hopefully get a campus visit come April. I dunno. Either way, I'm good to go. I'll be back in the military in no time.

Here we go again...

2008-02-21T14:18:00.002-07:00

Same old shit again...

I'm having this experience of deja vu, only this time I don't know what the odds are. I spoke to Capt. Anderson (the AFROTC Admissions Officer up at CSU) about joining the program. He said he'll try what he can to get me in. And if I don't go ROTC, then I'm headed back to enlisted. This time, SSgt. McLeoud will be my recruiter. She met me before when I was in BMT and she knows how perfect I am for military life. So she and her boss (the MSgt.) are gonna see what they can do for me aswell. I've already stressed to both that I'll jump through any hoop just to get back in.

Tonight I finally get a night to myself. I think some thinking and soul searching is in order. I might have to personally alter my winter BDU's that I have before I order another set. And I need to fix my shadow box. So my plans tonight are to clean my room, do laundry, figure out where the hell my underwear's gonna go, play video games with David, and work on my scrap book. I've got a lot of stuff to do, but I'll do it.

Let's hope everything turns out the way I want it. I hate civilian life...

Not the way I wanted to go.

2008-02-15T17:28:00.002-07:00

Well, I'm home for good now... Not really the way I wanted to go. I mean... Yea, coming home is a blessing and all, but.... I didn't really want to leave the Air Force. It's been my life for three years and it's hard... It's really hard for me to adjust right now. I think it was easier to adjust to military life than it is adjusting to civilian life.

I'm wearing the only set of clothes I have with me right now... If I could get my hands on a set of BDU's, I'll feel better... Maybe I just need to play some XBox live tonight, be with my boyfriend.... Oh yea, that's right, I have a boyfriend. I guess this is how you'll find out Mom, lol. Anyway, my thoughts on leaving the Air Force...

I'm scared. I feel vulnerable and open and unsafe. I always knew in the Air Force that if something were to happen to me, that things would be taken care of in an orderly fashion... But now I don't even think that'll happen. Once again my first night "home" isn't home. It's a futon at Natasha's place. Tomorrow I ride a train back to Grand Junction. I don't get there till about 1630, so that's an all day trip for me... 5 hours by car vs near 9 hours by train. Great. Not too excited here, despite what everyone says.

I really just wanna go back. I find myself crying at least once an hour for fear of not knowing what to do. I mean, I say that I'm going to be going to CSU, and I say I wanna ROTC, but where the fuck am I supposed to start? I did send an e-mail to the recruiter at Detachment 90, so I guess that's a start, and I want to take a campus tour beginning of next month, but what the hell am I supposed to do for money? What am I gonna do for a car? Being a lifeguard doesn't pay much, and I can't live off of the grand I have now plus my rebate and tax returns forever... And now I cry again.

I'm not ready for civilian life. I'm too military to survive out there... What the hell am I gonna do now?

A city with no people

2008-01-22T22:20:00.000-07:00

In this city, there are no people.
The lights are on in all the houses, but there is nobody on the streets.
Are there people inside? I peek in a window to find out.
There are people.
I look in other houses.
There are people there too.
This city is just like the rest.
Nobody comes outside anymore.
There are no people in this city...
I will leave this city to go to another one.
I hope that I will meet someone.
Someone just for me.
I want to meet that special someone.
This is what I think as I leave the city with no people.

Just as I feared, there's no one here either.
Everyone is inside.
Today I look for someone just for me.
Someone who has love for me.
Someone who will love me even if I can't fulfill their wishes.

But...
There is a voice...
The voice asks...
Does such a person exist?
I need someone whose love for me is true.
Someone who loves me without asking anything in exchange.
Unless the someone loves me for being me,
They're not "someone just for me."
Is this so?
It is.
This someone exists?
He does.
If so, then where?
My someone is nearby.
Perhaps I already know him.
But... What if that person does not love you back?
What if that person likes someone other than you?
Then I'll have to decide what must be done.

Is this city with no people truely happy?
I don't know.
Because happiness depends on the individual.
All people are different; no two are the same.
What makes one person happy might make another sad.
People's souls come in all shapes and sizes.
And as time goes on and a person grows, their soul can change.
Their hopes and dreams can change.
That's why there isn't just one type of happiness.
Then...
Then there must be a way that I can be happy, too!
That is all I want, isn't it?
To find the person just for me, to find my own happiness...
That would be wonderful, wouldn't it?
But there is only one person just for me...
And I still have not found him.

A person's heart cannot stay the same forever.
A person's heart changes a little bit everyday.
Because that is their nature.
It can be different.
It doesn't always have to be the same.
If he finds in me the things that make me special...
If he likes me because I am me...
If that happens, we may be able to become something a little different from before.
I may not have to lose what's most important to me...

What's most important is something precious.
Something I can't lose.
The proof that I am who I am.
The special proof.That proof will tell me who my someone is.
That special, special...
"Someone just for me."

Once, long ago, I lost something precious to me.
I went through something very painful in the past.
Even now, my heart hurts.
Something very, very painful.
Even now the pain still lingers from when I lost what was precious to me.
But I am still searching.
Still searching for that thing most precious.

I am me.
Because I am me...
Because it is so...
Someone who loves me because I am me.
Someone who I'll love because he is him.
The "someone just for me."
I am happy when that person smiles.
I am happy when that person is near.
I am happy when that person is happy.
That person is special, different from other people.

I found him.
The person that's precious and special.
The "someone just for me."
I have found him.
I fell in love with him because he is that person.
Hopefully he will find them.
The things that I can do because I am me.
The things that I can't do because I am me.
That person will find them.
And then hopefully he will love me because I am me.
Out of all people I want him to find me.
And I want him to love me.

This feeling inside of me is very soft.
But sometimes it hurts.
I become full of this feeling when I think of that person.
Do you feel that way about everybody?
No, only when I think of that person.
What happens when you're with that person?
I get warm, like I'm glowing inside.
What if you can't be together?
It hurts.
It really, really hurts inside.
I hope I can be happy someday.
When I find my "someone just for me."

But...
If I don't become happy...
If the "someone just for me" knows all the things I can and cannot do because I am me...
Then...
I am afraid that the hurt inside will be so bad that I will break.
It's a powerful feeling, isn't it?
A hurt so strong it can cause me to break.
There are no people in this city, but...
But through their windows, everyone looks happy inside.
Are these people truely happy?
I am surrounded by people who stay inside...
... But I am all alone as I walk through this city with no people.
All that I want right now, more than anything else is to be with him.
The glow inside is brightest when that person is near...
...And the pain inside hurts more when he is away.
I am happiest when I think about that person.
I am saddest when I think about that person.

That person makes all my feelings more intense.

That must be what love is.
So please...
Let the person that I love be the "someone just for me."

This city has no people....
But the light burning in the homes are warm and bright.
I am in a city with no people, but I am not sad or lonely.
My heart glows.
That's because I love this person.
The heart of someone who's in love is kind and warm.
If my heart is this warm...
If I can be this happy...
Then I wish that all those like me can fall in love,
And that all of them will have their love returned.
The love we feel may not be the same...
...But it doesn't matter when I'm with the "someone just for me."
If we can all find that special person, then the world will be the most joyus place.
This city will have no unhappy people.
It's the special city that has the someone just for me.

-"A City with no People" by CLAMP

Hagane no Kichigai (Ichi!)

2008-01-19T12:39:00.000-07:00

If you can't read japanese, the top says "Fullmetal Freak 1". =3 Part one of my Fullmetal freak rant! It will have pictures, mind you...

One would think that being in the Air Force, my love for anime would dwindle down to nothing and I would completely focus myself on my new life... HA!! Yeah right. Sorry Mom, but being an Otaku is in my blood... And with being an Otaku, one has their absolute favorite anime/manga. Mine is Fullmetal Alchemist (Hangane no Renkinjutsushi). Why do I love this anime? =3 Because it's about the military!!

So, I want to show the world just exactly how much of a kichigai I can be! That, however, will come with tonight's post and a special Fullmetal Alchemist edition of An Airman's Life. =3 Gotta go film!!

And now for something completely different!

2008-01-15T23:28:00.000-07:00

So I'm gonna start making videos for my friends and families! =3 It's gonna be fun. I already have tonight's video up and posted (hosted by your lovely YouTube) and boy did I have fun with it. Tomorrow's video should be fun. Gonna try and do stuff.... Like go bug the recruiter, lol.

Mom and I went to two Gamestops today. I got me a webcam for my XBox 360 and 5 movies, mom got her the Brain Academy for the DS. It still boggles my mind that my parents have become gamers. Anyway, One of my friends from XBox Live wanted to video chat with me so we did. It was fun. Frankie, however, must have a taste for XBox headphones... He tried to eat mine again.

I don't have much to say really, because I'm about to go head off and play some XBox. If you wanna contact me, my Gamertag is trinityrenee. =3 Just cause I'm cool like that.... OH!! And because I love you all...

AN AIRMAN'S LIFE: INTRODUCTION

For friends and Family...

2008-01-15T17:12:00.000-07:00

I started this blog to not only keep myself in check, but to give thanks and honor the one driving force for me wanting to serve and protect my country: My family. They have really been behind me every step of the way, Mom and Dana being the core of my 'strong will' as everyone says. Thank you so much guys, I love you all. Afterall, it'll be a Miracle when I graduate, right?

My name is Breanna Danielle Miracle. I am 20 years old and enlisted in the United States Air Force. Huah! I swore in 2Jul07 and it's been the best decision of my entire life. Not only have I experienced the hell of training, but I've seen and tasted the real operational Air Force. And ya know what? I love it. I only have two more weeks of training. Besides, it's not permanent, right?

I'll be trying to writ in this thing every day till I leave, then I'll send letters to mom so that she can post them up here for you all. I love you, and thank you all for the support! Off we go into the wild blue yonder!